Monday, February 25, 2008

Le Prix Eau Faux, 2008

Perfume press releases being what they are, the great folks at Now Smell This have put together a contest. Contestants are to create a fictitious new perfume house and fragrance, with short paragraphs serving as press releases for both. The prize is immortality in purple prose a la Bulwer-Lytton, and a $100 gift certificate from Luckyscent (one of my favorite haunts).

The drawback? I forgot to tell you about it until now, and the deadline is Friday.

Go forth and create silliness, if you are so inclined:

The original post on Now Smell This

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Dammit, Ralph Nader

I hear that Nader's decided to run for president again.

Remember, folks, a vote for Nader is a vote for McCain. I'm sorry it works out that way, but it really does.

I have great compassion for any resistance to the two-party trap (particularly the alternating Bush - Clinton - Bush - Clinton dynasties... ugh!) I am highly principled to the point of Quixotic behavior in daily life. I have lost friends, left groups I enjoyed, and taken the hard road through life in other ways in order to speak the truth and stand by my notions of virtue. But I ask you to remember that there is a time to stand on principle, and a time to be shrewd.

Fool me once... won't get fooled again.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Lying by omission

This wonderful video (and great illustration of the notion of lying by omission) was linked for my benefit on a forum where I play. This should amuse those of you who, like me, are both Muppet-obsessed and have dirty minds.

The Count (Censored)

Now let me tell you about the [beeeeep!] Dritz Heavy Duty Plier Kit and Medieval Torture Device For the Criminally Insane for applying eyelets and snaps. [beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!!] I got one of these things today, on sale no less, as a quick life-improvement tool so that I could stop using safety pins on some snappable essentials. I want to put snaps on things. I even have heavy duty snaps to do the job with! But.... I've been fooling with this thing for about an hour and a half (with Pat's help) without success.

What they tell you: how to use the sucker with normal snaps.

What they don't tell you: that even if you figure out which part of a heavy duty snap is which (there are 4 parts and no, it's NOT obvious, damn it), you may not be able to get the bastard to work. Also, you may tear up your garment in the process of trying to figure it out.

Fuck Dritz. Damn sadistic Drow mofo.

Okay, enough growling. Back to work on this snap-affixing project.

If you're not done shirking yet, though, feel free to go check out Clare's wonderful new blog, Trapdoor Zombie! It will be linked in the margin from here on out.

UPDATE: Poor tool design. I am still bamboozled and frustrated but determined to find either a workaround or better parts... for now, I eventually solved the problem with a hammer and a screwdriver used as a chisel to smash down the superfluous little post. Unpretty, but yeah, it works.

Seriously, there is nothing functional about this design. Either little old ladies who sew a lot know something I don't (very likely) or they don't complain when someone sells them a bum steer (also possible.)

Macha barbarian with a hammer always wins when she combats bad design. Muhahaha.

Friday, February 1, 2008