emotional and intellectual baggage
First thought: BUY A BIDET!Second: "The Comfort Wipe allows you to retain your dignity and your hygiene!" Lady, you APPEARED IN THIS AD. You have voided any right to speak about personal dignity for the rest of your LIFE.Third: Since you can't see your butt, here's a device that won't let you find it by feel, either! You'll find out that you missed by smearing shit all over your hindquarters. Hygienic! Yet dignified!Fourth: My word verification is "hinop." That sounds like the department tasked with inventing the Comfort Wipe. Short for "Heinie Operations." I think that "Project: ASSCRACK" was also considered.
Bill, you slay me -- that's hilarious!Yes, the dignity issue was the most jaw-dropping one for me. Reeeeally? You got to keep your dignity with a plastic stick up your crack? Most of us draw the line differently (and in less disgusting media, to be sure).Mine is "pelts," which I hope isn't a verb, under the circumstances.
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