Checks have started to arrive from the gub'ment. Evidently making a call to the complaints department at the EDD and telling them you will soon be reduced to eating shoe leather, even though you know your claim decision has been reversed and should now be upheld, works. Because they mailed them out TWO DAYS after I made that call. And of course a representative hasn't called me back yet... wanna bet me they never do?
I can afford the $1 for a "gentleman's bet" now. Except gambling is illegal so let's bet something symbolic, like a cake recipe.
Speakin' o' cake, I submitted to demands from our January birthday crowd (Rob, Dave, Micah) to make fawncy chocolate lava cakes with creme anglaise and (for everyone except Dave, who hates fruit with his chocolate dammit) macerated berries. And nomnomnom. Want the recipe, folks? If so let me know and I'll dig up the recipes and stuff. You will use a lot of eggs on it if you make it. That, I know.
...er... what else... oh yes, I've been knitting chain links of wool yarn for a slightly edgy "necklace" scarf (there are patterns all over the internet, but it's basically "cast on 21 stitches on 3 dpns, use 4th dpn to work 7 rows in stockinette, cast off, weave in ends, and tug gently to get stockinette to roll up. Then insert link into the next link you cast on and repeat ad infinitum. Felt when done." They look bootiful. Yarn life, boy-ee!
And I'm always behind the times on the Internets, but for God's sake go discover Leslie Hall if you're like me and behind the times too. Because she's hilarious. And good for her and her gold spandex. "Work through the pain!"
And because that reminds me that Dave mocked me earlier for being behind the trend on the Internets by a couple years, and because you may be too, I figured I'd share this glittering gem: Incompetech, home of any frackin' kind of graph paper you might care to customize and print out at home. Ahhhh, nerd Mecca.
Be good to each other. Love you folks.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Knitting. Go 'way.
I just realized I haven't updated here in FOREVER. And it's for a good reason.
I discovered knitting. In 2 1/2 weeks, I have knitted 3 infant hats (they seemed like finish-able projects), 2 toy owls, and 2 adult hats (well, almost done with #2, will be by tonight.)
And I've learned lots of new skills, which is 1) why I decided to do this and 2) oh so satisfying.
But (despite the title of this post) I love you folks.
Lest I get all Romper-Roomy and Magic-Mirrory and list you, and tell you I am thinking of you each by name, I'm just gonna tell you I love you all. Because that's less stalkery.
Hey! There WAS good news. I had my unemployment insurance adjudication hearing on the 7th and guess what? I won! Here's the Kafkaesque glory (which freaks me out somewhat): after 5 months of remunerated broketitude, I AM ELIGIBLE BECAUSE MY BOSS DIDN'T LIKE ME FILING A CLAIM.
It goes like this:
1) horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor.
2) try to get along with horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor.
3) do pretty well, but horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor asks me to commit claims fraud.
4) refuse to commit claims fraud, and realize that this is the third time in about 4 weeks that horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor has asked me to commit insurance fraud.
5) agonize. Realize that since boss has never once punished horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor for any action including screaming at boss and storming out, taking off any time she wants, spending all day on personal calls, and abusing fellow employees -- and previous instances of fraud -- nothing good will come of this.
6) quit.
7) file EDD claim.
8) get hired back during horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor's off hours, training my replacement.
9) boss gets copy of EDD paperwork stating that horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor was askin' me to commit fraud and that I felt my license/morality were in jeopardy.
10) boss gets pissed off and fires me mid-day, telling me to get off the premises.
11) claim rejected because I quit voluntarily and neither morals nor license worries the state. I file an appeal.
12) MONTHS later have adjudication hearing. Ex-boss shows up and asks me not to include e-mails between us in my evidence, as she feels these were private. Tell ex-boss that that is not possible, as all MY communications were always professional.
13) adjudication hearing is grueling. Be interrogated for 45 minutes and then some back and forth misery wherein ex-boss lies her head off AND fortunately contradicts herself enough that truth can be surmised.
14) receive notice that original claim would not have been supported, because after all the state doesn't give a fuck about my morals or license... but since she fired me through no fault of my own (for filing the claim!) I am covered after all.
15) WTF? But I guess it's cosmic justice. I DO care about my morals and license, and think I was totally justified in quitting. The abuse would have been sufficient, but the fraud requests were the poop icing on the poop cake.
I have never so sympathized with Josef K.
Mind you, they still have taken no steps whatever to pay me... and I have no idea how long they will take, as it is impossible to get through to the EDD in person, by phone, or by carrier pigeon. When the Ouija board finally tells me what's going on, or when a check arrives, I'll let y'all know.
So... what's new with you? I have heard NOTHING from some of you in forever... Troy and Heather? You okay? Greg? Don't make me get out my Magic Mirror, folks! :)
I discovered knitting. In 2 1/2 weeks, I have knitted 3 infant hats (they seemed like finish-able projects), 2 toy owls, and 2 adult hats (well, almost done with #2, will be by tonight.)
And I've learned lots of new skills, which is 1) why I decided to do this and 2) oh so satisfying.
But (despite the title of this post) I love you folks.
Lest I get all Romper-Roomy and Magic-Mirrory and list you, and tell you I am thinking of you each by name, I'm just gonna tell you I love you all. Because that's less stalkery.
Hey! There WAS good news. I had my unemployment insurance adjudication hearing on the 7th and guess what? I won! Here's the Kafkaesque glory (which freaks me out somewhat): after 5 months of remunerated broketitude, I AM ELIGIBLE BECAUSE MY BOSS DIDN'T LIKE ME FILING A CLAIM.
It goes like this:
1) horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor.
2) try to get along with horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor.
3) do pretty well, but horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor asks me to commit claims fraud.
4) refuse to commit claims fraud, and realize that this is the third time in about 4 weeks that horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor has asked me to commit insurance fraud.
5) agonize. Realize that since boss has never once punished horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor for any action including screaming at boss and storming out, taking off any time she wants, spending all day on personal calls, and abusing fellow employees -- and previous instances of fraud -- nothing good will come of this.
6) quit.
7) file EDD claim.
8) get hired back during horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor's off hours, training my replacement.
9) boss gets copy of EDD paperwork stating that horrible, abusive coworker/supervisor was askin' me to commit fraud and that I felt my license/morality were in jeopardy.
10) boss gets pissed off and fires me mid-day, telling me to get off the premises.
11) claim rejected because I quit voluntarily and neither morals nor license worries the state. I file an appeal.
12) MONTHS later have adjudication hearing. Ex-boss shows up and asks me not to include e-mails between us in my evidence, as she feels these were private. Tell ex-boss that that is not possible, as all MY communications were always professional.
13) adjudication hearing is grueling. Be interrogated for 45 minutes and then some back and forth misery wherein ex-boss lies her head off AND fortunately contradicts herself enough that truth can be surmised.
14) receive notice that original claim would not have been supported, because after all the state doesn't give a fuck about my morals or license... but since she fired me through no fault of my own (for filing the claim!) I am covered after all.
15) WTF? But I guess it's cosmic justice. I DO care about my morals and license, and think I was totally justified in quitting. The abuse would have been sufficient, but the fraud requests were the poop icing on the poop cake.
I have never so sympathized with Josef K.
Mind you, they still have taken no steps whatever to pay me... and I have no idea how long they will take, as it is impossible to get through to the EDD in person, by phone, or by carrier pigeon. When the Ouija board finally tells me what's going on, or when a check arrives, I'll let y'all know.
So... what's new with you? I have heard NOTHING from some of you in forever... Troy and Heather? You okay? Greg? Don't make me get out my Magic Mirror, folks! :)
Monday, January 11, 2010
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Underpants! UNDERPANTS!!
So, Christmas has come and gone. We had a wonderful Christmas eve, calm and loving, with my mom & brother Robert & brother Dave & sister Jes, eating too much (my mom is a rockin' cook but she goes kind of mental at the holidays and cooks for, like, 16-to-20... when there are 6 of us) and playing Scrabble Upwords. Then we went to Mom's on Christmas morning to open gifts and have breakfast, and went back over in the evening for another ENORMOUS delicious dinner with brother Robert & some friends. And we ate SO MUCH. But we couldn't play with our toys because we had the dinner party and then we had a mini-road-trip because Mom/Robert/Pat's boss Suellen gave us a generous gift of 49ers/Lions tickets (we are a mixed bag of Bears & Packers fans, but y'know it was fun) and we were on the road and also eating SO MUCH as we road tripped. We went to Dave & Buster's on the way and played some wonderful stuff (guys, play Hyperbowl if you get the chance... it's hilarious) and stopped at Maru Ichi on the way back home.
OMG, Maru Ichi. If you are ever near Mountain View, you have to go. Expect to wait in line (we miraculously didn't, past 5 minutes... usually it's very long) and expect to eat a lot. The food is miraculous. I had kuro ramen, and could wholeheartedly recommend miso noodles and spicy miso ramen for the others (the only two main dishes I've tried other than the kuro ramen.) Kuro ramen? A heavenly elixir of deeply infused pork flavor surrounding and bathing homemade ramen noodles, with browned garlic and sesame oil lending it a deep black patina of oil, garnished with tender vegetables, slices of tender pork, hard-cooked egg, and nori.
Then we went to the BookBuyers store, which is -- well, look, for people like me, it's a cathedral. It's a vast used book store, clean, friendly, organized, and eclectic. It has a huge science fiction section, amidst its other virtues. And it had a copy of a cookbook co-authored by Mandy Aftel, utilizing essential oils in the kitchen... too cool! So, that's my gift to myself.
On the topic of gifts, I am proud of myself because I made gifts for many of my friends/family. Note: although this may SEEM cheap, it's not actually less expensive than purchasing gifts, especially if you were to factor in labor costs. But I did lots of home canning (strawberry vanilla bean jam, vanilla pear butter, spiced apple butter, pomegranate jelly, cranberry-grapefruit marmalade, blueberries in gin syrup, and I think I'm forgetting something now but you get the idea), jewelry manufacture (homemade earrings!), a bespoke perfume for my brother capturing (as requested) the aromas of single-malt Islay Scotch whiskey (crafted to resemble a 40-year Scotch), fine suede leather, pipe tobacco, and sandalwood (I called it Impeccable), and a T-shirt transfer for Robert featuring my own "artist's rendering" of our favorite Rock Band band logo:
The band is called "Moustache Ride?" and we laugh every time we see the squid logo, so, you know, a band T-shirt was called for.
I also made a small easy-chair out of duck tape, cotton balls, florist's foam, and felt, because we needed a present for mom to unwrap even though her gift is us replacing her recliners in her "green room." So we made her a little chair and taped a gift certificate for chairs to it. She liked the chair even before she knew what the REAL gift is. Heh.
Yeah, yeah, I know, I should take more pictures.
But it was a busy Christmas and weekend. After we had all this busy-ness keeping us from playing with our new toys and Christmas gifts, it was a rare pleasure today to open several packages of Brand! New! Underpants! For both of us. And put these in the wash. And now I am waxing philosophical about underpants.
Is there any greater pleasure than nicely fitted, un-torn, brightly colored new underwear? I think not.
Men's and ladies' underpants are different entities, though. While ladies' (mine anyway) are silky microfiber with cloth-covered elastic, men's (Pat's anyway) are the equivalent of a hair-shirt for one's junk. I asked him what kind he wanted and he said, "[brand] lasts the longest..." I was appalled.
"That doesn't matter! Let's assume that you will always be able to afford $10 for a couple new pair of underwear, so it doesn't matter how long they last. Which are the nicest?"
"Well, that's what I'm saying, I hate when they get holes in them."
"That shouldn't worry you, because then you THROW THEM AWAY."
"[Brand] has the sturdiest fabric."
"... what about the softest?"
"I don't like that, because then they slide around and give me a wedgie."
"Covered waistband or not?"
"Definitely not, because the soft ones give me plumber-butt and crack kills."
"So basically they need to be as uncomfortable as possible."
"Yes."
So a hair-shirt for the junk it is, I guess. Men's underwear also come in such lovely colors as gray and gray. And more different, darker gray. I bought "assorted" colors in preferred brands for both of us, assuming we didn't care, and this is what we got:
For him: the stretch equivalent of burlap, with naked sports elastic with little grippy teeth, in primer gray and gunmetal black. (He will be ecstatic with these; they are exactly what he wanted.)
For me: silky microfiber, with covered no-roll elastic bands and the inevitable cotton crotch, in pastel solid colors and dainty stripes. (They fit and they AREN'T rough and scratchy and elasticky-grabby, so they are exactly what I wanted too.)
Ah well. Anyway, folks, hope you had a wonderful holiday, surrounded by love, and that you are pleased with any gifts you got, or got yourself. Hugs to all of you!
OMG, Maru Ichi. If you are ever near Mountain View, you have to go. Expect to wait in line (we miraculously didn't, past 5 minutes... usually it's very long) and expect to eat a lot. The food is miraculous. I had kuro ramen, and could wholeheartedly recommend miso noodles and spicy miso ramen for the others (the only two main dishes I've tried other than the kuro ramen.) Kuro ramen? A heavenly elixir of deeply infused pork flavor surrounding and bathing homemade ramen noodles, with browned garlic and sesame oil lending it a deep black patina of oil, garnished with tender vegetables, slices of tender pork, hard-cooked egg, and nori.
Then we went to the BookBuyers store, which is -- well, look, for people like me, it's a cathedral. It's a vast used book store, clean, friendly, organized, and eclectic. It has a huge science fiction section, amidst its other virtues. And it had a copy of a cookbook co-authored by Mandy Aftel, utilizing essential oils in the kitchen... too cool! So, that's my gift to myself.
On the topic of gifts, I am proud of myself because I made gifts for many of my friends/family. Note: although this may SEEM cheap, it's not actually less expensive than purchasing gifts, especially if you were to factor in labor costs. But I did lots of home canning (strawberry vanilla bean jam, vanilla pear butter, spiced apple butter, pomegranate jelly, cranberry-grapefruit marmalade, blueberries in gin syrup, and I think I'm forgetting something now but you get the idea), jewelry manufacture (homemade earrings!), a bespoke perfume for my brother capturing (as requested) the aromas of single-malt Islay Scotch whiskey (crafted to resemble a 40-year Scotch), fine suede leather, pipe tobacco, and sandalwood (I called it Impeccable), and a T-shirt transfer for Robert featuring my own "artist's rendering" of our favorite Rock Band band logo:
The band is called "Moustache Ride?" and we laugh every time we see the squid logo, so, you know, a band T-shirt was called for.
I also made a small easy-chair out of duck tape, cotton balls, florist's foam, and felt, because we needed a present for mom to unwrap even though her gift is us replacing her recliners in her "green room." So we made her a little chair and taped a gift certificate for chairs to it. She liked the chair even before she knew what the REAL gift is. Heh.
Yeah, yeah, I know, I should take more pictures.
But it was a busy Christmas and weekend. After we had all this busy-ness keeping us from playing with our new toys and Christmas gifts, it was a rare pleasure today to open several packages of Brand! New! Underpants! For both of us. And put these in the wash. And now I am waxing philosophical about underpants.
Is there any greater pleasure than nicely fitted, un-torn, brightly colored new underwear? I think not.
Men's and ladies' underpants are different entities, though. While ladies' (mine anyway) are silky microfiber with cloth-covered elastic, men's (Pat's anyway) are the equivalent of a hair-shirt for one's junk. I asked him what kind he wanted and he said, "[brand] lasts the longest..." I was appalled.
"That doesn't matter! Let's assume that you will always be able to afford $10 for a couple new pair of underwear, so it doesn't matter how long they last. Which are the nicest?"
"Well, that's what I'm saying, I hate when they get holes in them."
"That shouldn't worry you, because then you THROW THEM AWAY."
"[Brand] has the sturdiest fabric."
"... what about the softest?"
"I don't like that, because then they slide around and give me a wedgie."
"Covered waistband or not?"
"Definitely not, because the soft ones give me plumber-butt and crack kills."
"So basically they need to be as uncomfortable as possible."
"Yes."
So a hair-shirt for the junk it is, I guess. Men's underwear also come in such lovely colors as gray and gray. And more different, darker gray. I bought "assorted" colors in preferred brands for both of us, assuming we didn't care, and this is what we got:
For him: the stretch equivalent of burlap, with naked sports elastic with little grippy teeth, in primer gray and gunmetal black. (He will be ecstatic with these; they are exactly what he wanted.)
For me: silky microfiber, with covered no-roll elastic bands and the inevitable cotton crotch, in pastel solid colors and dainty stripes. (They fit and they AREN'T rough and scratchy and elasticky-grabby, so they are exactly what I wanted too.)
Ah well. Anyway, folks, hope you had a wonderful holiday, surrounded by love, and that you are pleased with any gifts you got, or got yourself. Hugs to all of you!
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